3 posts tagged “daily rant”

I was talking to Phisto last night and told her about my new Vox blog.  In her words, "You have another blog??"  Smirk.  Yep.  I don't know if it's an obsession or an addiction.  Then she asked, "So which one is going to be your primary blog?"  So far I have been posting in both equally.  I don't know this Vox blog seems to have a different tone to than Dubh Croi.  And being Me, I can talk for ages about absolute crap that I think people actually want to read/hear. 

And perhaps, just maybe if I write enough I can train my writing brain back into the well oiled machine it was back in the "day."  Well that's what I tell myself.  So far I've been doing this since before "Blogger" and "blogs"--and my brain still is mired in writers block.  I really can't blame the kids.  I was going down hill before their eggs matured.  I think it all goes back to An Sceal(r) and the wreck it turned me into.  My real phobia: What I write might just come true.

See that concept is what I should turn into a book for NaNoWriMo -- but it's been done before.  It's a common enough plot for a story and it does hit too close to home. 

2006 was also a year of mourning myself and trying to find myself.  Realising I lost myself a bit while busy raising children--and I miss that person.  I miss the uber-creative Birdwell.  The gal that had such big plans.  I want to find her again and introduce her to my new life.

I've been so obsessed with getting 2006 over and gone and rehashing all the bad things that seemed to dominate 2006

But good things did happen to us--great things actually.  I met a new friend, L. and her fiance.  My brother got married.  I got to introduce my kids to their great grandmother.  We went to Myrtle Beach.  I got a proper yarn stash.

All these are great things.  But the good always seems to be overshadowed by the bad.

Fucked up plumbing, two (now three) broken cars, money shortages, job worries, family issues, stress and all that made me depressed and hopeless.

But 2006 is over and it is up to me to make 2007 better.  Looking on the bright side and getting dressed before noon.

Thud. Thud. Thud.

I am being quite pathetic.  And very ridiculous.  All day I have been contemplating adding folks to my "neighborhood".  I am brand new to the Vox bandwagon.  I have been seduced finally over to Vox by reading the Vox blogs of people that have other blogs that I have read for years and years, before there was even Blogger and we all did this "journal" thing by FTPing and self coding.  But I am not as witty or famouz as them. I'm shy and so have lurked.  Read, but not participated.  Now I like Vox because of the neighborhood and the fun post prompts.  But when it comes to creating my neighborhood: saying "Hi" and introducing myself well I want to run away and lock my door.  (Much like I am in real life.  We have lived in this house for 5 years and we have yet to introduce ourselves to the neighbors.)

Yet I am Birdwell.  Here me roar!  My ego can knock your ego down a flight of stairs.  I need multiple blogs to hold my ego.  Heck HAVING a blog proves you have one hell of an ego. 

Can one be shy and egotistical?